It’s hard to believe that something could top going out in public with one eyebrow.
BUT, it happened long ago (circa 2005) and I thought I’d share.
Brian and I went to PF Changs for dinner and I thought I was breaking out in hives from something I ate there (turns our I am allergic to J&J’s baby lotion.) Anyway, there were little bumps on my forearms and I started to freak out. We called my mom and Brian’s brother to ask what to do (he’s a doctor and my mom is- well, my mom)- they both said to go get cortisone cream.
So, off to Walgreens we went. By this point panic had set in and I wanted to get that cream on me ASAP.
I jumped out of Brian’s corvette (remember that car?) as soon as it pulled into the parking space. I frantically rant to the first sales clerk and yelled “where is the cortisone cream!!!????” He looked at my frantic face and immediately yelled back, “aisle 8!”
I ran to aisle 8 and in big letters I saw CORTISONE. I didn’t feel like wasting time so I pulled it out of the tube and started rubbing it on my arms. The placebo effect was setting in and I immediately felt better.
I strolled up to the open register and set the empty box in front of the sales clerk. Here is our conversation (which at the time I thought was weird):
Her: (peaks in box to see nothing is in there and looks confused)
Me: “oh, don’t worry I put it in my purse. I put it on in the store- I had a bad reaction to something I ate and broke out in a rash.”
Her: “you put it on in the store?” horrified look
Me: now questioning my judgment and getting a little irritated at her – “yes, I did- I had a bad reaction to something I ate and I was breaking out. I got really nervous and just opened the tube and put it on in the aisle- geez I hope that’s okay”
Her: “um, I guess so…..”
I went back to the car and threw the box down on the seat. Brian looked down at it and also had a confused look on his face.
Brian: “why did you buy that?”
Me: “Your brother told me to get it!” (duh!)
Brian: “he told you to buy ANAL itch cream?!”
Me: (grabs the box and looks horrified at the conversation I just had with the sales clerk) “OMG!”
Brian: “well, it does say cortisone on it, did you just grab the first thing that saw that said it?”
Me: (embarrassed) “YES!- oh my goodness- you’re never going to believe what I told the person ringing me up”…. (explains story)
Brian: (uncontrollable laughter)
So, that is my story. If you can top it (I pray that you can) I would love to hear your story……..